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On Banality/How I Generally Spend the Hours Between 4 and 5 PM
The dog’s Juno. She is 35% nuisance and 65% fun (the unit of measurement determined by calculating the amount of urine due to overexcitement upon my opening the door to her house x proximity to my shoes/how in the mood I am to feel a deep vicarious satisfaction watching this animal, meant to run in an open field, run in an open field). When other dogs try to boss her around, she backhands them with her paw. Occasionally she will bring me a stick from the sea. Thus spake Sellwood.